What Are Marshmallow Parents?
Do you know what marshmallow parents are? In recent times, many types of parents have been described, because, honestly, we must recognize that each of us educates differently. Since there is no education manual, everyone acts as best they can. Also, we often end up contradicting everything we said we would never do once we become parents.
Among the types of parents that have been discovered, there are also so-called “marshmallow parents”. This definition is attributed to parents who educate their children without placing any limits on their actions. Everyone is free to educate their children as they prefer; however, in some cases it is possible to make serious mistakes.
Being too condescending and permissive with children can turn us into marshmallow parents. Claudia Sotelo, director of the Center for Specialization in Childhood Psychological Studies, explains what it is about.
Characteristics of marshmallow parents
There are many marshmallow parents nowadays. In general, they are the ones who work a lot and whose income allows them to give too many things to their children. According to what the expert reports, other characteristics are the following:
- They are generally between the ages of 30 and 45.
- They come from a family that has given them a rigorous education.
- One of the parents, or both, is soft and sweet (like marshmallows, in fact).
- They are generally professionals and workers.
- They do not set rules and tend to discipline their children very little.
- They have over-cuddled children.
- They do not encourage little ones to adopt habits.
- They do not tolerate their own children’s failures, but tend to blame someone else for them.
- Marshmallow parents are unaware that this kind of education endangers their children’s future.
Without realizing it, this type of parenting harms their children in several ways. When they educate them they think only of seeing them happy, of gratifying them and pleasing them, without having any doubts. However, many times these decisions can have consequences on child behavior.
Pointing out our weakness or inability to set boundaries can make the child avoid facing reality. In his home, his parents please him in everything, but the real world is very different. Consequently, even if what we want is their good, perhaps, in reality, we are making a serious mistake.
How does unfettered education harm children?
It is indisputable that marshmallow parents are animated by good intentions. Generally, they come from families with a very restrictive upbringing, in which a glance from their parents was enough to scold them. Consequently, they wish to change this threatening educational model, to prevent their children from going through the same experiences.
Unfortunately, some extreme behaviors can lead to undesirable consequences. Among the main effects, we can observe the following:
- Children educated according to these principles generally have a low tolerance for frustration. This means that if their wishes are not met, they can throw a tantrum and challenge anyone who stands in their way. Consequently, such behavior causes children to develop problems with their parents, teachers, friends and family.
- They are unable to solve problems on their own, because parents do everything for them.
- During adolescence, their behavior can spiral out of control. According to the expert, children of marshmallow parents are more prone to fall prey to some addiction.
- They have a hard time accepting and following the rules.
- They may suffer from disorders associated with eating and / or sleep, because parents allow them to go to sleep at the time they want or not to eat if they prefer. Other habits, such as hygiene habits, can also be compromised.
- They learn little about the hierarchy, with the result of not respecting adults, because their parents are always on the same level as themselves.
- Children of marshmallow parents know their parents’ weaknesses and are able to perceive their fear of their children’s anger. In this sense, children often emotionally manipulate adults.
- They have not been educated to face reality, which is why they can fail in many aspects of life.
- Most of the problems generated by the behavior of these children do not manifest themselves exclusively within the walls of the home. In fact, it is known that coexistence with other people is also generally compromised.
- They find it difficult to work in a team, which ends up damaging their academic performance.
